Are you Healed or Healing?
Everybody says they want a relationship with a healed person.
But nobody can ever tell me what healed actually looks like.
Is healed vegan?
Alkaline?
Sun-gazed and sage-smoked?
Is healed having a “good” relationship with your parents—no childhood smoke, no ancestral debris leaking into your love life?
Is healed quoting scripture, posting devotionals, praying loud, saying “God told me” before every decision?
Is healed fiscally sound, credit right, rent paid early, savings stacked, no emotional overdrafts?
Because if that’s the standard—cool.
Count me in.
I’ll light the candle and pass the collection plate.
But let’s be real.
People with plant-based plates still ghost.
People who love Jesus still manipulate.
People with therapy language still refuse accountability.
People with money still bankrupt intimacy.
So miss me with the bullshit checklist.
Healing is not aesthetics.
Healing is not branding.
Healing is not “looking evolved” on the internet.
Healing is capacity.
Capacity to sit in conflict without turning cold.
Capacity to be corrected without flipping the script.
Capacity to say “I was wrong” without adding a sermon after it.
Capacity to love without making someone else responsible for your unprocessed wounds.
A healed person isn’t perfect.
They’re present.
They don’t weaponize silence.
They don’t spiritualize avoidance.
They don’t call control “boundaries” or ego “self-love.”
A healed person knows their shadow—and doesn’t outsource it to their partner.
Healing doesn’t mean you’re finished.
It means you’re faithful to the work.
Faithful to God and to self-examination.
Faithful to truth, even when it indicts you.
Faithful to growth that costs you comfort, pride, and old identities.
I don’t want someone flawless.
I want someone honest.
Someone regulated.
Someone who can pray and apologize.
Someone who loves God enough to stop hiding behind Him.
That’s the relationship I’m building toward.
Not healed like “nothing’s wrong with me.”
Healed like “I know what’s wrong with me—and I’m not running anymore.”
Fin.
-Psstol
